It Almost Midnight

Got nothing to do but wait for midnight. Can't sleep 'cause I slept earlier. In some other places, people are celebration Halloween but here in my town it's almost unheard off. People are usually preparing most of of the day to visit their dearly departed family. Some might be there already in the cemetery spending the night. It's some sort of gathering of the family to commemorate and celebrate the life of the deceased. Tomorrow, I think I will visit my grandma's tomb together with my family.

It's ironic that in some parts of the world, people are treating this day as a celebration or party of some sorts but here in my country, it's more of a solemn day as we prepare for the All Saint's and All Soul's Day.

We are honoring the dead while other dress as dead/scary individuals scare around. We really have diverse cultures.

Mutually Assured Destruction (M.A.D.)

Mutually Assured Destruction (M.A.D.) was a nuclear defense strategy used by the US during the Cold War which theorizes that "if the Soviet Union and the United States have their urban population at risk, then neither will attempt a first strike."

I first came across this term when I overhead heard my supervisor talking to someone about this kind of strategy with their opponents. Didn't understand it then but got a clue on what it was because he talked about the cold war. Just now, I was reading a Reader's Digest (December 1982 issue) and got some sort of explanation on how this strategy would have been used.

Based on that brief reading, I found out that the effects on this on you and your opponents would not be "mutually assured" because you have different capabilities and terrain. Both of the parties may get some damage but the winner cannot be assured. I think whenever, this strategy would be used, it should be as a last resort.

Stained Celebration

Today was the 105th founding Anniversary of my hometown but today's celebration was stained with grief because the LGU's Security Officer was killed in his home this morning, just after the celebration of the mass at the city's covered court. Today was supposed to be the culminating day of the week-long festival, including tonight's gathering of the pioneering settlers of the town. I bet think the LGU's mood tomorrow will be of quiet distress of how such an unfortunate event happened on day of joy.

Full of Controversy

Several activities were held today like a dance competition and a basketball game as culminating activities of the festival season. And in these activities there are a couple of controversies that arises due to some technical and organizational problems. Although some of those grievances are coincidental, I believe that some of it have basis because as one of the spectators it is inconceivable for me to such a uneventful performance with a win. The judges may have seen something different but I think the spectators know who the real winners are. They may just have to get them next time.

Just Got Back

I've been out for five days to Subic and Manila this past week. Just arrived this evening. Spent most of the day traveling and it was tiresome. I'm still feeling woozy from all the traveling just to get back home and my body still aches. Ir would be nice to have a massage and a cold back right now but i'm still feel hot from todays journey. Andnow I can sleep in my bed and feel the comfort of home and my belongings. Hotels and Inns are not suitable for me because I can't sleep well in it. I like to be with the familiar things and people to be comfortable. It's nice to be back home. Got to give some "pasalubong" tomorrow to several people and another for someone special. I hope she likes it even though she doesn't really know that I like her. (sigh)

Solitude of Early Morning

For me, the solitude of early morning is the most precious time of the day. There is a quiet serenity that disappears a few hours later with the hustle and bustle of the multitude.

Early morning hours symbolizes for me a rebirth; the anxieties, frustrations and woes of the preceding day seems to have been washed away during the night. God has granted another day of life, another chance to do something worthwhile for humanity.

Michael E. DeBakey, heart surgeon

I Love My Name

I created this one using the Scriptina font and I like the result. I'm just wish that my signature would looks something like that but it won't happen (sigh).


The one below is an ambigram of my name that I found on the internet. I don't knwo who the creator that is by I like the look of it.

Brownout This Evening

We experienced a brownout here in our area just this evening while we were having our dinner. I was afraid that the lights won't turn on tonight because I have to endure the rest of the night just sitting or lying in the corner until I feel sleepy. I usually sleep late at about midnight or even after that. Spend most of my time tinkering with my computer, surfing the net or watch a video. I'm happy that it came back so I can do something in my computer.

Doing Some Powerpoint Presentation

I was assigned to do a Powerpoint presentation for my boss for the conference we're attending next week and I'm having problems with the design right now. It's already laid out but it's not really amazing too look at. Very basic look of a Powerpoint presentation. My problem is the fact that I'm not an artistic person who can conjure some great design that would amaze the viewers. I can do what he wants me to do on any design or effect that would want to be placed in it. I can plot what deign is on your mind by I can't conceptualize a design. I think nexr week, there will be some revisions on the current look of it because my boss is somewhat particular with designs and the aesthetic look of things. i'm more of a content kinda guy.

Working with Microsoft Office 2007

I'm having difficulty adjusting to the Microsoft Office 2007 because I was used to doing things in the 2003 version. The items that I was looking for are not anymore in their places. I'm still learning the 2oo7 version. For beginners, the Office 2007 is good because it is all presented in front of you. You don't have to look for those items under the drop down menus. However, for us individuals who were using the Microsoft Office ever since the 1997 version, it takes a while to get accustomed to the new look. The only thing I can remind the users out there is to always save your files as "word 1997-2003 document" which has the file extension ".doc" whenever you are using different computers because the 2007 version with file extension ".docx" will not open in lower versions. So to be safe, save it as ".doc".

On Official Travel

Next week, I will be going to Manila, and maybe Subic, to attend some sort or seminar or presentation. I’m not as excited as one might think because I don’t like flying because I get woozy when traveling. My first experience with Manila was last June and I wasn’t impressed. Too crowded for my taste but I’ve never been to Subic before so this is my chance to look at the sights and sounds of the place. I like to see their zoos and maybe the place where they show the dolphins. I’m just hoping that I can tour the place somehow but I’m not sure that it can happen because I have to be in contact always with my superiors. So basically, I’ll be following their time schedule. Bon voyage.

Making the Ordinary, Best

This may be the land of equality
Where one is as good as the rest,
But I personally feel
That we ought to repeal
The law making Ordinary, Best.

Philip W. Kelleher

This somehow describes what I think about when I seen people describe something like new movies, music and other things released in the market nowadays. People always describe it as the best movie they've seen or could be the best action movie, most romantic. In other cases, they think it was their best thing ever made or written. What have we succumbed into? Have we lowered the standards for excellence we have set on what we like? Let’s face it, all of these things are just marketing strategies aimed to promote something. Those companies just came up with description just to sell something. I could understand it with the persons being paid to say something to promote a product because they just do it for the money. However, I have seen videos and articles written about what their impressions of several products, especially in movies saying something like “it’s the best ever” or something to that effect. Are they really saying the truth? Are they just obliged to say something nice or maybe they just want to be seen in front of a camera? Have we lost our ability to say something as it is? Let us set standards of quality are real and not something is just forced upon us to fit in. I think in those cases some of those people would just shut-up.

Thinking of Finishing It

I just had a conversation with a friend and she thought that we should finish our master's. It's about two years since I finished my academic subjects but I didn't pursue my thesis because I didn't feel like doing it and it costs a lot. Also, I was living somewhere where my pockets have to be tightened. Now, since I have nothing to do after work, I was thinking about pursuing it again. I don't know if I would still qualify after the long lay-off by I will try. Maybe it's time for me to finish it.

Internet Connection Installed

Just this past week, my internet subscription was installed. I now have more time to surf the net, chat with friends and, more importantly, to update my blog. For a long time, I've been doing researching and updating my blog from the office or from an internet cafe. Being in internet cafes is uncomfortable to me especially when I'm writing something like my blog because I have to rush everything and always keep tab on the hours spent there. Subscribing to an internet connection is also is practical for me because I spent a lot of time on the net and the amount I pay there is more than what I pay for my monthly subscription. Now, it's time to enter the electronic universe of the internet.

The So-Called "children of god"

Children of God, as I have been taught throughout my life, means all of us living on this earth. However, this past week, I learned a new meaning for this phrase. A sort of negative connotation of what basically is a religious word. The new meaning implies the “untouchable” bunch of employees who are, most of the time, exemption to the rules & regulations that were made & implemented by the management. It was told to me that they came up with this description in reference to the religious meaning that the Children of God are close to the heart of God, now they use it to as a reference to the people who would be first on the management’s list. It doesn’t matter if they whether they fit or not. Oftentimes, these “children of god” are accommodated individuals who they have known for a long time or people who have helped them before. They could also refer to the people who they pity and try to alleviate a little the life of these persons. However, this accommodation doesn’t come without a price; it requires blind loyalty and support to the causes advanced by the management.

Although, this is some type of charity for the management to look after their people, I have some problem with it because helping doesn’t anything in return. Help people for the sake of helping and not because of the expectation that they will serve you in the future. Is this how we serve people now? And why are these things tolerated and never questioned? It is because you don’t want to be seen in bad light by the management. But they would never admit this. Sad but true.

Agitated Me

Lately, I'm quite agitated for reason I have yet to discover. Releasing my sentiments with no reservations even against the powerful. I tend to say what I want without hesitation especially my observation on my surroundings that makes a person like me abhor the dealing around me. The rebel in me is unleashed when I see wrong things being defended by people who are afraid of opposing the people in-charge because of possible retaliation.

I am one of the perceived individuals accommodated by the higher-ups. I am not one of them. It may look that way but I am not. I just came to work because it was offered to me and they believed that I can do the job assigned to me. Belief in my abilities is not one of my strong suits. I tend to doubt my abilities because of my fear of failing and being wrong. My doubts makes me cautious but also leads me nowhere. And that lack of confidence really bothers me.

And So Begins, Again...

Its' my second day on the job and I'm still learning my old job. I'll get the hang of it sooner because eventually more assignments will come my way. It's been some time since I last this type of work again. My old job was more or data monitoring and gathering while this one entails a lot of writing formal documents. The one thing that still bothers me is the ample time spent doing nothing because the boss is not around to tell the employees what to do. Maybe it is only my perception that some of them can only use their abilities once they are allowed to do so. There is a lot of time waiting and I really mean a lot of time. I'm not used to just sitting in a chair half the day doing nothing. I have to do something while in the office like writing, reading or editing something related or unrelated to my work. Those lag times between work makes me sleepy even in a room that I'm not comfortable with. I hope that I will be assigned a computer and not share with the whole office because I cannot write and be be interrupted always, it disrupts the flow of thought on that particular assignment. Maybe, eventually I'll adjust to working in this type of environment again. Til' then.

Same Old Answer

Have you ever known someone who has the same old answer to a question at different points in your life? Well, I know one who does. The problem is I like this one and for her, I’m just the one consults me when she has technical problems. No hi or hellos in any other day of the year. She could be likened to a common business impression that when you ask a Chinese businessman about his business, he will always say that it is losing.

Let me make myself clear first, the question I asked is not a romantic question whatsoever. I just asked her the same question today and she just replied the same old answer. This answer may be true sometime but not all the time. Or maybe, I just caught her with the same question at a wrong time so her answer is justified. I don’t think so. I have know her most of my life and the odds of me asking at the wrong time all the time is close to zero.

Today, I begin to wonder, is her answer just meant towards me. I don’t like to feel that I was “just accommodated” as something in someone else’s like especially from the people I consider as my friends and the people I like. Sooner or later, I will find the answer to my questions.

I have already expressed to her that I missed her before and she just treated it as a joke when she knows that I don’t play around and I have never lied to her. Maybe it is time to see if she will remember me somehow.

First Day Low

I started my new job today. I spent most of the morning just sitting around because the boss was busy and spent about an hour working in the afternoon because the boss was busy. He just handed me files for me to study and make something out of it.

It’s difficult to make what he asked for at the present because there are only two computers available, one laptop and one desktop, and both are used by all the employees in the office interchangeably. I guess I’m not good at preparing my reports on paper because I constantly revise what I do or change immediately what I think is wrong in my reports so making it in the computer is more viable for me.

On my first day, I was greeted by the people who used to know me while others wonder what I was doing there. The location and people have changed slightly but it is more or less the same atmosphere I left almost three years ago. The people’s attitudes haven’t changed a bit, only their uniforms. They made me remember an old saying, “The more they try to change, the more they stay the same.

Working Again

I will start working tomorrow. I don't know what my job will be or who I'll be working for. However, I don't feel anything about working back there again. I'm not anxious or excited. Just want to go there tomorrow and start doing what i will be assigned to.

I really don't know what will happen tomorrow. Maybe stir up a little gossip somewhere on why I did come back after leaving it almost three years ago. I know I was over-hyped by some individuals there, even now. They think I am very good at something, and that something is what I am skeptical about. It's hard to live up to something that is expected of you.

I liked working in other places because I can start fresh, nothing much is expected of me. They will judge me only by what I am doing and nothing else. But here, I have to live up to the the excellence of my parents. Be at par or greater than their abilities. This excellence was already expected of me even before I graduated It's nice to be known for something good, however, it is difficult for me because I was already expected to be good at something without proving myself yet. Maybe, this is how it works in the place I live in. I have been dealt with such a card and all I can do is do my best to make that card work.

There is something that i want to make myself clear and maybe to others as well, I was offered this job and I took it after much contemplation. I didn't look for it or even wanted it. And since I have accepted this new challenge, I will prove to myself that I was right in choosing it and do a good job while I'm at it. This is just another step of development for me and for my future. I just hope it works.

Watching Mamma Mia with Mama

I’ve just seen the movie “Mamma Mia” with my mother this evening. She didn’t come with my father and me when we watched it in the big screen. Such a wonderful movie, she remembered some of the songs. However, I think I knew more songs from the movie than her. It was a fun viewing and she remembered the lyrics to "Chiquita" and "Dancing Queen". She even cried in one of the scenes. We both enjoy watching musicals especially the ones we know the lyrics to the songs so we can sing while the movie is playing. I know I’m not a good singer, not even a fair singer. I’m at singing but I love to sing, mostly with friends who understand and put up with my less delightful voice.

The Return of the Comeback

I'm back where I began. Next week, I will be starting my new job. It will be going back to something I have don before. But I hope there are changes to it. The previous job was quite boring and predictable. Sometimes when we do something repetitive, we tend not to pay too much attention to it because we were used to it. It makes us complacent, unenergized and less motivated to do our job.

I will return to work on something that I presume I was good at because I was offered to return after almost three years. The work was challenging but the outputs are less to be desired. It is not in my nature to compromise on what the best course of action would be, but in this case I have to because I think that some of the individuals involved are not keen on the results but what can they get out of it. Sometimes, some individuals would just present to you something they have seen somewhere and immediately want it implemented without knowing if it is applicable or not.

I hope i will develop humility and increase my patience and also learn more from this new endeavor that I will be undertaking. I have pointed out the negative I've previously experienced but I hope that I will find positive change to something I have left long time ago.