Monday, December 1, 2008

Lady Luck Wasn't On My Side

I was so excited and nervous before my recent trip. Anticipating what might happen, what would I say and what would I do. Rehearsing over and over in my mind the things I have to do to tell someone that I like them. But, alas, she couldn't meet with me because of some prior arrangement. Those were valid arrangements because she had planned it out beforehand and I was just trying to, maybe, insert myself in to her schedule. All that trip for nothing. I stayed in there with nothing to do. No plan B. That was it, it was my only goal.

I tried to do it outside my hometown because I don't know if such actions would be done discreetly. Tried to follow her on her vacation. Silly me. But things didn't turn out as planned, as it always is with my affairs of the heart.

God-willing, I hope that one of these days she'll meet with me. Just couldn't picture out her reaction if I asked her for a date. There's still time for me to prepare my nerves if that time comes. Talked to her before but not like this one that I'm about to do. Telling a friend that you liked them and want to be more than friends with her. I've done this before and it always end with disappointment.

Can't worry about what might happen, I just have to tell her what I fell. It's up to her to react and for me to wait for her reaction. Just thinking about it makes me my hands tremble and my heart beating faster.

Gotta keep calm.

But I don't know if can be calm about it.

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